Funny Answering Machine Messages
#1 TALK LIKE PINKY AND THE BRAIN:
Voice 1: Gee, Dave, what do you feel like doing tonight?
Voice 2: Same thing we do every night, Rob... Try to take over
the world! (Sing:)
They're David and the Rob,
Yes, David and the Rob,
One is a drummer, the other needs a job.
They're not at home right now, so please don't have a cow,
Leave a message -- for David and the Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob.

#2
Please leave your name and number -- But first, a short algebra quiz: How much is 5Q + 5Q? (Pause while caller thinks: 10Q) You're welcome!


Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hi. Now you say something."


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?"

(Darth Vader voice:) Speak, worm!

"Hi, you've reached the North Pole and this is Santa. I can't get to the phone because I'm out dining with the Misses and the elves are out barbecuing Blitzen. Please leave a message and I will get back to you if I can save Rudolph in time...BEEP"